Wednesday, February 14, 2007

It took them long enough.

Tonight's excuse for the non-live "live" blog': I was at my friend's birthday party. Happy Birthday Afnahn!

Anyhow, let's get on with it...


judge jru's "live" blog of the tenth episode of the Idol 6

9:00 pm - At the end of this hour, we will know who we get vote for. Finally.

9:01 pm - I'm very excited!

9:02 pm - We know what they are going to do Ryan. You don't need to tell us again.

9:03 pm - Sanjaya Malakar needs a haircut, but I still enjoy him. And his touching relationship with his older sister. It makes me feel like Idol contestant are JUST LIKE US!

9:04 pm - WoooooOOoo Sanjaya is thru!



I have a sneaking suspicion that he will make it to top 12...unless he totally screws up next week (and the week after...and the week after next).

9:05 pm - We have the tall girl (aka: Anna Kerns)!

It's a shame she doesn't make it.

Don't hate on the tall people, Simon! Don't you dare marginalize us!

We WON'T be marginalized!

Tall people of the world will all come together and unite someday. And then, you'll be sorry. Very sorry.

9:06 pm - Who the heck is Bernard Williams?

9:07 pm - Well, I guess we don't have to worry about who he is...because he's a goner.

9:08 pm - What the F? My favorite lesbian folk singer, Tami Gosnell, didn't make it!

I call shenanigans!

9:09 pm - My timid titmouse (aka: Melinda Doolittle) has made it thru!



I'm so happy I could cry!

9:10 pm - My other favorite former backup singer (aka: Brandon Rogers) has made it thru too!

I'm loving everyone right now.



Especially Brandon.

9:12 pm - What's this?

Jenry Bejarano doesn't appear to be in the room!

Where's my Jenry?

Can anyone find my Jenry?

9:13 pm - Gina Glocksen makes it thru too.

I feel kind of impartial to her.

She seems fine, but nothing that special.

At least she's happy.

9:15 pm - I faintly remember Haley Scarnato. But I'm not feeling her either.

9:16 pm - Do I really have to listen to 20 seconds of that stupid Bryan Adams song, again? Ugh.

Also, who the F is Philip Stacy?

Clearly, I need to pay better attention to this show.

9:17 pm - Oh...Phil is the really bad new father. Eh.

9:21 pm - I enjoy "The Simpsons" as much as the next boy, but do we really need to see a GIANT plug for "The Simpsons Movie."

9:22 pm - Sister Ru has declared that Chris Sligh is the NEW Kurt Nilsen.

9:23 pm - I'm so over Blake Lewis' beat boxing.

It was tired when Justin Timberlake did it.

So that means it even more tired-er when Blake does it.

Yes. I know tired-er is not a word, but it's late and I'm tired. You might even say that I'm more tired-er-er than Blake Lewis' beat boxing routine.



And so, despite the beat boxing (or maybe because of it) Blake makes it to the top 24...

9:24 pm - ...but my favorite Brit boy bander, Tom Lowe, doesn't make it.

9:25 pm - Some boy named Rudy also makes it.

Like other Idol top 24 members of years past (Patrick Hall, anyone?), Rudy is fine...but nothing special.

9:28 pm
- Barefoot Boy Paul Kim is enjoyable to me, because he wants to outshine William Hung. And yet, I'm a little done with his whole I will ONLY perform barefoot routine already. It feels like a gimmick. The Clarkson didn't have a gimmick Paul. Neither did Fantasia.

So get with the program dude. Put your shoes back on and just SING.

9:30 pm - 17 year old Jordin Sparks is the NEW Lisa Tucker...



...which means that I'm done with her.

9:32 pm - Who the heck is A.J. Tabaldo?

I guess we'll find out next week.

9:34 pm - I don't know who this Stephanie Edwards is...but I already enjoy her.

9:35 pm - Who this? Seriously dude...who is this? Where are they finding these people?

Leslie Hunt?

Have we ever seen her before?

9:36 pm - The guy that bowed out during the Hollywood round last year (aka: Nick Pedro) is up next.

He makes it thru.

And I could care less.

9:39 pm - Alaina Alexander (aka: the girl that cries all the time) ain't all that and a bag of chips.

In fact, she isn't even a bag of chips.

And she makes it THRU?

Really dude?

They are totally scrapping the bottom of the barrel this year.

9:42 pm - Chris Richardson (aka: the slightly less cute Justin Timberlake) makes it.

I'm happy for him.

He seems like the kind of guy you can bring home and then, three hours later...



...you discover your little sister humping him in the kitchen.

9:44 pm - Sabrina Sloan.



Another moderately talented girl that I've never seen before makes it thru.

Boring!

9:45 pm - Awww Lakisha Jones (aka: the super-talented single mother) is in the top 24!



She'll definitely get my vote next week.



Many many of my votes.

9:49 pm - Nicole Tranquillo. Another newbie to make it thru.

9:51 pm - OK. I've got a bone to pick with the Idol producer. Why were they holding out on me? Why were they trying to keep me from my true love?

Forget Jenry.



Jarred Cotter is my man.



And I think he's legal!



The fact that he "knows" Naima is something that we're just going to have to work through.

9:52 pm - Meet Amy Krebs.

Like so many that have come before her, she's new.

She also in the top 24.

That is all.

9:53 pm - There are only two ladies left...Antonella Barba and some other girl.

I wonder who will make it?

9:54 pm - Of course, Antonella is the girl that is the final piece in the top 12 girl puzzle.



She IS gorgeous.

And gorgeous people always get what they want.

9:55 pm - And now it's down to the final two contestants of the night...Sundance and that guy with a mugshot (aka: Thomas Daniels).

I wonder who will make it?

The guy with the criminal record? Or the guy with the semi-famous dad?

9:56 pm - And of course the guy with the semi-famous dad (aka: Jason "Sundance" Head) makes it into the top 24.

BUT he's got to make up for a lot of ground he lost during Hollywood week.

When I first saw Jason, I thought that he was definitely top 12 material.

Now?

I'm not so sure.

10:00 pm
- And now we have the top 24.



They seem VERY nice.



Well...at least some of them do.

* * *

And just in case you need things broken down into easy-to-digest morsels, I now present to you...my handy cheat sheet to the top 24 of the Idol 6.

judge jru's
TOP 24 cheat sheet

(Idol 6 edition)


THE LADIES

1. Melinda Doolittle
(aka: the timid titmouse)

2. Gina Glocksen (aka: the loud girl who got all pissy with Perla during Hollywood week)

3. Jordin Sparks
(aka: the new Lisa Tucker)

4. Haley Scarnato
(aka: seems nice)

5. Stephanie Edwards
(aka: enjoyable)

6. Leslie Hunt
(aka: who is this?)

7. Alaina Alexander
(aka: she cries. a lot.)

8. Sabrina Sloan
(aka: seriously dude, who is this?)

9. Lakisha Jones
(aka: the single mother that cries a lot)

10. Nicole Tranquillo
(aka: no idea)

11. Amy Krebs
(aka: no idea 2 - electric boogaloo)

12. Antonella Barba
(aka: the pretty girl from Jersey with the really bitchy best friend)


THE GENTLEMEN

1. Brandon Rogers (aka: the hot hot former backup singer that "knows" Fergie)

2. Sanjaya Malakar (aka: adorable younger brother of Shyamali Malakar)

3. Chris Sligh (aka: the funny fat guy)

4. Blake Lewis (aka: the beat boxer)

5. Rudy Cardenas (aka: nothing special)

6. Phil Stacy (aka: the lamewad that missed his daughter's birth to audition for the Idol)

7. Paul Kim (aka: NOT William Hung)

8. A.J. Tabaldo (aka: some dude)

9. Nick Pedro (aka: some dude that quit the Idol 5 during Hollywood week)

10. Chris Richardson (aka: not quite Justin Timberlake, but close)

11. Jared Cotter (aka: my new boyfriend)

12. Sundance Head (aka: semi-talented guy with the semi-famous father that screwed up a bit during Hollywood week)

9 Comments:

Anonymous Jmacksgirl said...

OK, its like you are reading my mind! SO what the heck was up with the picks do ya think? I couldnt wait to read your blog regarding all the no names they chose, I feel jipped we didnt see OVER HALF of these semi-talents and they made it thru! What happened to Tatiana (the tiny 16 yo with the big voice, much better than Jordin?) Your blog is awesome by the way, I have sent it to several friends and my sister who reads at work while she should be you know, working.. Keep up the good work!

5:56 AM  
Blogger Brian Cormier said...

I'm picking Sanjaya Malakar to win over Chris Sligh in the finale.

9:30 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Whats with this wanna be Uncle cracker Sligh kid? This guy is your typical local opera singer stand in. I dont see the relation to a marketable singer and this guy...

11:57 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

If you cant see they are looking for a pop male vocalist this year you have'nt watched. Richardson seems to be the obly marketable cadidate and can actually sing, he seems to have instrument and composer talents as well, I look for him to do well. As for the bonky the clown Sligh? Who would market this guy? And the wanna be liberache' uncle kracker guy? Come on... Las Veaga has better acts than these two can put on. There are 4 others that will finish above these two.

2:02 PM  
Anonymous Littlest Ru said...

How did you know that i would totally hump Chris Richardson in your kitchen?

3:57 PM  
Blogger Joy said...

Somehow I got the feeling that Simon's opinion was vetoed over and over again by Randy and Paula. I was really disappointed by some of the cuts.

Oh well, I'm voting for Chris Sligh anyway.

7:41 PM  
Blogger kjl said...

I'm totally with you, jru--I swear I'd never seen half of these people before in my life! I don't think the producers have done a very good job so far. And what DID ever happen to Jenry? I don't rememeber ever seeing him in Hollywood at all--did anyone else?

11:49 AM  
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6:40 AM  
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