Monday, July 31, 2006

Clay wants it that way

As I was journeying through the world wide web this afternoon, I came across the mp3 of the year...




That's right.

It's the NEW Clay Aiken song.

The first NEW non-holiday related Clay Aiken song since his debut album, "Measure of a Man," was released in October of 2003.

Off his upcoming brand spanking NEW album entitled "A Thousand Different Ways," that is scheduled to "drop" on September 19th.


How could you NOT be excited for this one?

* * *

Uh...

Here's the thing...

I just listened to the song...

And...

Well...

It sucks.

And don't get all "you never liked Clay in the first place" on me...this judgement is coming from someone that still listens to "Invisible."

But don't tell anyone.

That's right.

I'm a closet Clay Aiken fan.

And I want to stay that way.

Forever.

(song via ONTD)

Saturday, July 29, 2006

If Hobbits can marry, why can't I?

Bad news for sister ru...

World Idol winner/sister ru's imaginary boyfriend, Kurt Nilsen, got married today in Norway.



Congrats Kurt!

It looks like your Idol fame finally snagged you something!

I won't even address your bachelor party disaster...



Because...



I...



I just can't.

(story/pics via ONTD)

Well...at least he's "aware" of the Idol

One of my favorite people in the world, Zak, just forwarded me this story about the Idols getting a tour of the White House by the one and only President George W. Bush.



I got all excited when I didn't see Elliott Yamin in this picture. I imagined that he refused to meet with the president as some sort of kick-ass political protest.

It turns out that he just arrived to White House a little late. And missed the photo-op portion of their visit.

Pussy.

Thursday, July 27, 2006

McPhee Returns!



And no one cares.


Although...


Kat was on "The View" today.


But that's only interesting...



...because Kathy Griffin was there.

Where's Joey Greco when you need him?**

Supposedly, the "always classy" Simon Cowell is cheating on his very lovely girlfriend of four years (Terri Seymour) with some model/bimbo that looks like Ivanka Trump's unfortunately less attractive brunette cousin from Eastern Europia.

Would you honestly trade in this...



For this???



If this rumor is true...Mister Cowell will officially become the world's second biggest idiot (after the Seacrest, of course).

CLICK HERE for the full story.


**And if you are really bored, click here to find out the mysterious identity of Joey Greco.

Wednesday, July 26, 2006

BIG Elliott Yamin News

According to one of the members of the ONTD community, Elliott Yamin has been dating a "LA" model by the name of Jamie Paetz.

She's very pretty in a bland and boring kind of way.





And just in case you are wondering whether this alleged relationship is all hubris and hearsay, check out these pics of Elliott and Jaime...standing next to each other!





The post goes on to mention Elliott's pre-Idol ex...and how she slept with him when he was in Virginia for his Top 3 Idol "homecoming."

According to this former ladyfriend of Mister Yamin, the little Elliott is...uh...three inches short of a footlong hotdog.

CLICK HERE to read the full "story."

* * *

I apologize to all of you out there that didn't want to know the size of Elliott Yamin's penis, but it's late and have no one to share it with who cares, so I'm sharing it with you.

Hope you don't mind.

xo,
judge jru

Monday, July 24, 2006

Closing Your Eyes + Grin = VERYhappy

Did I mention how excited I was for this THREE night event?



I might be just as excited as 'Tasia looks in this picture.

Actually, I'm probably more excited...because my boobs aren't about to pop out of my blouse.

Sunday, July 23, 2006

How to make a bad song even worse...

...stick the Seacrest in the video.



Licking Andy Dick and performing fellatio on an ice cream cone doesn't help either.

The answer is...



NEITHER.


I LOVE me some Clarkson. But homegurl has needed a new stylist for years.


(Photo via ONTD)

Saturday, July 22, 2006

It happened.

SYTYCD has officially surpassed the Idol as the BEST talent show on the TV.

CLICK HERE to see why.

Or just watch below...

Wednesday, July 19, 2006

Are you ready for some IDOL???

I just found out the release dates for some upcoming Idol CD releases on EW's very informative Popwatch blog...

  • Season 5 winner Taylor Hicks, runner-up Katharine McPhee, and Kellie Pickler all have records that are going to "drop" on November 14th.

  • Idol 3 winner Fantasia Barrino is dropping her own bit of musical bizness in the form of a CD on October 17th.

  • Idol 2 loser winner Ruben Studdard is releasing his own thang on September 26th.

  • Idol 2 top seller runner-up Clay Aiken is penciling in his very own record release party on September 19th.

  • The totally not gay Idol 4 defector Mario Vazquez is showing what he can (or can't) do in record stores on September the 12th.

  • And the wicked awesome Idol 2 runner-up runner-up Kimberley Locke has just released her new single "Supawoman" on iTunes...and her new album is due in stores sometime in the not-too-distant future (release date TBA).
Whew.

That's a lot of Idol for one boy to handle, eh?

Tuesday, July 18, 2006

Puppy Love

Simon hearts puppies.





Or something.

Monday, July 17, 2006

The Music Industry Has No Soul

This girl got her own record deal?



SERIOUSLY?

A stint on the talk show disastrophe known as THE VIEW?

That I understand.

Giving her the chance to record an ENTIRE album, while Elliott Yamin and Paris Bennett remain unsigned?

That I will never "get."

Sunday, July 16, 2006

Clarkson's is the NEW Jeff Gordon?

The following video is up on the Kelly Clarkson Ford website...



I don't know if it's the REAL final video for "Go," but it's ayight.

I do enjoy the idea of a GOOD colorful Kelly and a BAD black & white diva Kelly.

But maybe that's just me...

No Kelly! NO!!!

worst.



haircut.



ever.

Friday, July 14, 2006

America's Next Top Sex Offender?

A former "American Idol" contestant, Idol 5 semi-finalist Daniel James "DJ" Boyd, was accused of videotaping sexual encounters with two teenage girls and has since been indicted on child pornography charges.

CLICK HERE for the full story.

And then...if you really want to...CLICK HERE to see the idiot's MySpace profile.

I still have no clue who this guy is.

Thursday, July 13, 2006

Blazing Hot Ghetto Mess : The Movie

It's mystical.

It's magical.

It's the BRAND NEW trailer for the Fantasia Barrino story...starring Fantasia Barrino as Fantasia Barrino!



The only thing missing from this movie is duet with Raven-Symone.

But I guess I'll just have to wait for that bit...until the sequel.

It's Not TV, It's Kelly Clarkson

The Clarkson is getting her own HBO concert special!

It's going to air in February!

I might be more than a little excited for this.

But that should surprise no one.


CLICK HERE for the details.


(Story via ONTD...as usual)

Wednesday, July 12, 2006

Are you the new Taylor Hicks? Or the new Katharine McPhee?

The Idol 6 auditions begin in Los Angeles on August 8th.

Get ready.

Set.

Go.

CLICK HERE
to see where you can go to get berated by Simon, loved by Paula, and dawg-d by Randy.

Tuesday, July 11, 2006

Chris Daughtry is the NEW Whitney Houston!

Chris Daughtry signs with Clive Davis!

So that makes him either the NEW Whitney Houston...or the NEW Clay Aiken!

Take your pick.

CLICK HERE for the full story.

Saturday, July 08, 2006

Semi-Exciting News!



I already entered!

Have you?

Fantasia And Aretha 4 Evah!

Fantasia and Aretha Franklin have recorded a duet.

And they are releasing it.

Soon.

I might be a little excited.

CLICK HERE
for the full story.

Here's to hoping that a couple of "Baby Mamas" are name-checked on this one.

Friday, July 07, 2006

Plug Your Ears

Rap Superstar, Ne-Yo, and Idol Never-Was, Corey Clark, perform together for Steve Harvey.

All of G-d's creatures make beautiful music.



Well....maybe not ALL.

Thursday, July 06, 2006

Who wants Seconds?

Close your windows.

Lock your doors.

It's coming...



I had heard about this "film" a while back, but didn't believe it was real until my friend Aaron sent me the movie's official My Space profile.

And speaking of things no one asked for...



Oh Jim Verraros!

What the F were you thinking?

Wednesday, July 05, 2006

Fantasia & Jamie 4 Eva!

Fantasia and Jamie Foxxx performed a duet at the BET Awards a couple of weeks ago.

Enjoy the video...



...although I didn't.

Sunday, July 02, 2006

Brand New Clarkson!

As usual, I was on ONTD and I found a nice bit of Idol-joy. A new Kelly Clarkson song, recorded live at her concert in West Palm Beach.


It's pretty good. It's no "Go," but since it's Clarkson...I'm required to enjoy it.

Saturday, July 01, 2006

Seriously Dude...someone needs to get the Clarkson a new stylist

Kelly Clarkson kicked off her latest tour in West Palm Beach, Florida last night.







Can someone please fix Miss Clarkson, ASAP?

Pretty PLEASE???

(Pics via ONTD)