Wednesday, March 01, 2006

Chris is the NEW Ace

THE TOP 10 DUDES OF THE IDOL 5


1) Taylor Hicks ("Easy," by the Commodores) - Taylor Hicks is SO southern that he isn't able to refer to a knit hat as a cap or a beanie. He has to go all "fancy" and call it a toboggan!

I has absolutely no idea that "toboggan" was a word used to describe anything other than a sled.

Thanks for the lesson in Southern culture Taylor! You're the best!

As for Taylor's actual performance, let me refer you back to FourFour. Yeah. That's all I got.


2) Elliot Yamin ("Moody's Mood for Love," by James Moody) - I honestly don't know how it happened, but I think I've turned into a big Elliot Yamin fan. I have a feeling it might have had a little something to do with Elliott's sick mother talking about getting all "verklempt," but it could also be attributed to the fact that Elliot made me enjoy a song that I'd only heard Queen Latifah perform.

What can I say, I'm just a sucker for musically inclined Jews...unless their name is Kenny G. And then I hate them like poison.


3) Ace Young ("If You're Not the One," by Daniel Bedingfield) - It's so comforting to know that Ace is so pretty, because if he had Scott Savol-face...I'd predict that he was going to get his ass sent home.

Then again...Scott stayed around a thousand weeks longer than he should have, so clearly I don't know what the heck I'm talking about.

Please feel free to ignore my lame-ass.


4) Gedeon McKinney ("Change is Going to Come," by Sam Cooke) - Gedeon is so aggressively pleasant and nice that he makes me very uneasy. In fact, he makes me so uncomfortable with his giant fake megawatt smile that I can't watch him.

I hope the awkward one doesn't last too much longer in this competition, because his very existence makes me want to shoot myself in the face.


5) Kevin Covais ("I Heard It Through The Grapevine," by Marvin Gaye) - The idea that Kevin Covais has become a sex symbol is something I just don't know how to address. So I'm not going to.



And as for the whole Kevin looks like Chicken Little bit, I'm pretty sure my friend Mandel said it first.


6) Jose "Sway" Penala ("Overjoyed," by Stevie Wonder) - Lame. And just not worth talking about.


7) William Makar ("Lady," by Kenny Rogers) - Just when I think I couldn't feel any older, William has to go off and talk about how he was only 12 when the Guarini was on the Idol.

seriously?

Seriously?

SERIOUSLY?

Please excuse me. I think I just crapped my pants. The good news is that I have an excuse for that behavior, because apparently I'm old enough to wear Depends now.


8) Bucky Covington ("Thunder Rolls," by Garth Brooks) - Boring!


9) David Radford ("The Way You Look Tonight," by Frank Sinatra) - I've seen this show before. It's called "The John Stevens Show." And we all know how that story ends.


10) Chris Daughtry ("Hemorrhage," by Fuel) - I don't like Fuel. I've never liked Fuel. I don't care for their whole Nickelback bag o' rock bullcrap. But dude! Chris rawked the house with that song in a way that even Bo Bice couldn't.


judge jru votes

I voted for Chris more than a few times. And Ace once. And then I was done.


judge jru predicts

Sway. David. William. Bucky. Two out of those four are most definitely homeward bound.

4 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Thank you for everything you do!
I have really looked forward to and enojoyed you'r blog for two years now. You are the best!

3:35 AM  
Anonymous Ann from ohio said...

I agree with three of the four predictions for who will be sent home next...The only one I don't agree with is Will. I think he has a good voice and deserves to stay around and be in the top 12.

8:15 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Tho they can't sing.... I want some of the cuties to stay for the inevitable summer concert tour... so bring on the will, the ace, the david and the chris.

5:48 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Tho they can't sing.... I want some of the cuties to stay for the inevitable summer concert tour... so bring on the will, the ace, the david and the chris.

5:48 PM  

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