Tuesday, February 07, 2006

Simon's Boston Tea Party

judge jru's not-so-live blog of the final audition episode of the Idol 5

8:00 pm - WoooOOoOo Boston!

8:01 pm - Clay Aiken is that you?



8:01.2 pm - OK...maybe not so much.

8:02 pm - Vanilla Ice is that you?

Wassup with those shaved bits in your eyebrows?

8:03 pm - OK...Rob Van Winkle you ain't.

8:06 pm - Basketball Star Ayla Brown has got major pug face.



8:14 pm - Most. Awkward. Azerbaijani Audition. Ever.

8:21 pm - O'Donahue twins are verry pretty, but they still bug.

8:22 pm - Becky O'Donahue can't sang though.



But she's still going to Hollywood.

Ugh.

Becky makes me nostalgic for Tiffany Montgomery...oh, I'm sorry...I mean Ryan St*rr.

8:24 pm - Tatiana Princessa Ward chose the wrong damn song.

But she's got a very cute mom.

8:33 pm - Holly Corrente seems like a very lovely person. Shame about the whole not-going-to-Hollywood thing.

8:35 pm - Kenneth Maccarone is all that's wrong with the homos.



I'm gonna die alone.

8:42 pm - Cute boy alert!

8:44 pm - Kevin Covais is like an even more adorable version of John Stevens. Only Kevin can sing.



He's like the cute little stray puppy that you find and take home to mom.

8:51 pm - PAINFUL!

HATEFUL!

AWFUL!

Clay Aiken 2 gives me MASSIVE case of the homo shame.

8:54 pm - Awesome! We are FINALLY done with the audition episodes!

Thank G-d!

Thank Yahweh!

Thank Muhammad!

We are F-ing done!

2 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

I swear to god that that guy kenneth went to school with me at Syracuse University.

7:29 AM  
Anonymous Boston Tea Party Historian said...

Funny reference to the Boston Tea Party considering British got their asses kicked...

12:06 AM  

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