Wednesday, November 30, 2005

Carrie lets Jesus be her "Designated Driver"

Carrie's video for her country single, "Jesus Take the Wheel," is up over at Yahoo Music.

As you would expect, the video features Carrie looking up towards the heavens again...



...and again...



...and again.



And THEN...just for added spiritual goodness, the director sticks in a bunch of washed out shots of a sad old man...feeding his sick wife!!!



Seriously?

Is this what an American Idol's first video should look like?

Frankly, I liked Diana DeNoNo's "Emotional" video disastrophe more than this shite.


CLICK HERE
to check out the random dullness of it all.

Tuesday, November 29, 2005

Simon Settles

Thank G-D for this...which not only ensures that Simon will be around for the Idol 5...but also guarantees that we will see an Idol 6, an Idol 7. an Idol 8, and an Idol 9.

Now if only they could get rid of Paula...then we'd be all set.

Monday, November 28, 2005

America's Next Top Seventeen Cover Girl

Check out the Clarkson looking cute on the front cover of the January 2006 issue of SEVENTEEN...



Try as I might...years later...I am not a big fan of Kelly's nose ring. It looks like one giant bejeweled booger.





To read the interview with Kelly, click here...then here...and then finally click here.

In the article, Kelly reveals that she is dating this man...who opened for Kelly when I saw her...and I believe I called him "the poor deaf man's version of Train."



Even though I don't care for his music...I'm sure he's "very nice."

(Photos via JJB)

Saturday, November 26, 2005

Double Your Pleasure!

Miss Paula promises not ONE but TWO sets of talented twins on the upcoming Idol 5!

Click here to read more on Paula hyping the Idol 5 twin-off.

WooOOOoOOoO TWINS!

Because seriously that worked out SO well before.

Wednesday, November 23, 2005

All she needs now is a People's Choice Award...

CONGRATS Kelly on your TWO AMAs!!!

Clarkson's AMA #1 - Adult Contemporary Music
Clarkson's AMA #2 - the T-Mobile Text-In Award

Here's to hoping that you never have to present with that Kenny G again!




(OK...OK...those shots are from the 2004 AMAs...but still...I couldn't resist.)

Tuesday, November 22, 2005

Clay Hearts Your Vagina

Do I really need to say anything about the following item (available at the official online Clay Aiken store)???

Bo Meets VO5

Bo Bice's new album cover has finally been revealed...



Hmm...I think someone's been having a little fun with the straight iron and the VO5.

For those that want to know, Bo's album drops on December 13th...just in time for Chrismukkah!


And if you need a reminder of who this Bo character is, I'm sure you'll catch Bo on one of his MANY talk show appearances...

Dec. 5 - Bo Bice - The Tonight Show with Jay Leno
Dec. 6 - Bo Bice - Billboard Music Awards
Dec. 9 - Bo Bice - The Today Show
Dec. 9 - Bo Bice - Regis And Kelly
Dec. 13 - Bo Bice - Ellen
Dec. 19 - Bo Bice - Radio Music Awards

Monday, November 21, 2005

No Simon = Worst. Idol. Ever?

Say THIS isn't so Simon!!!

Sunday, November 20, 2005

Kelly Walks Away!

Look what I just came across in the lastest list of Billboard's single reviews...


ARTIST: KELLY CLARKSON

SINGLE: WALK AWAY

The unstoppable Kelly Clarkson has filled 2005 with honest-to-goodness songs. Ten years from now, we'll still be hearing "Since U Been Gone" and "Because of You," two of few pop aces in an arid year. Her fifth cunning hit from "Breakaway" again charges with a monstrous vocal, cool melody, crafty pop/rock production and a clear love-me-or-leave-me theme. Best yet, "Walk Away" is soaked with its own personality and refreshingly different from the previous four smashes.



I knew it! I knew that Kelly would finally listen to me and release my favorite Idol-related track of all time as a single!

There were rumors that "Addicted" would be the fifth single off of Miss Clarkson's "Breakaway" album...yet someone...somewhere...knew that this song was the one that I had been waiting to hear on the radio!

It looks like Chrismukkah has come early this year for judge jru!!!

Thursday, November 17, 2005

Pretty in Crimson

Check out Carrie Underwood working the red carpet at the CMAs...











Damn yo, I don't even like the ladies like that...but this beotch looks GOOD!

Idol Baby - REVEALED



Whose cute baby is that you ask?



Why it is Bo Bice's Baby, Aidan...of course!

Wednesday, November 16, 2005

Fantasia Who?

According to "sources," Idol 3 cast-off Jennifer Hudson has beaten out Idol 3 winner Fantasia Barrino for the lead role of "Effie" in the upcoming feature film version of the Broadway musical, "Dreamgirls," co-starring Grammy Winner Beyonce Knowles, Oscar Winner Jamie Foxx, and Tony Winner/"From Justin To Kelly" co-star Anika Noni Rose.



If you need a refresher on just who the heck this Hudson chick is, click here and check out her awesome rendition of the Dolly/Whitney classic, "I Will Always Love You."

Gurrrrrl...Miss Thang can SANG!

Anderson Cooper hearts the Seacrest

THIS is the funniest frickin' thing I have ever seen!



(link via towleroad)

Tuesday, November 15, 2005

Clarkson of the Year!

The one and only Miss Kelly Clarkson has been named "WOMAN OF THE YEAR" by Blender magazine!

I'm not sure what that means exactly, but it's still VERY exciting news!



Click here to see video of the above photo shoot.

Clarkson, the Wise

That Clarkson girl is SO smart!

Just look what she said about the idea of an acting career:

"I never wanted to be Julia Roberts and I don't want to be the 15th person to go from music to acting."

Hear THAT Will Young?

You are NOT and you NEVER will be Julia Roberts...no matter how delicious Judi Dench thinks you are!

Saturday, November 12, 2005

Carrie, the Cow Tipper

Through sources that shall remain unknown, I got my hands on Miss Underwood's upcoming debut LP, "Some Hearts." I've only scanned through the whole thing once. And, it's pretty much what you would expect from the Country Cyborg...middle of the road country pop muzak.



However, there is a bonus track...that is just TOO kitschy country not to share.

Just check out this lyrical sampling...

My hotel in Manhattan holds more people than our town.
And what I just paid for dinner would be a down payment on a house.
I'd rather be tipping cows in Tulsa than hailing cabs here in New York.
But I ain't in Checotah Anymore.


To download the full Checotah goodness for yourself, click below:

"I Ain't In Checotah Anymore" - Carrie Underwood

Thursday, November 10, 2005

Worlds are Colliding!

My inexplicable obsession with Mandy Moore and the Idol are meeting as one in a new movie entitled "American Dreamz," where the poplet** will be playing an American Idol-type contestant.

**starlet + pop star = poplet


Mandy Moore + Idol Parody Movie = judge jru in heaven


I seriously haven't been this excited since I saw the Aiken!


Story via Egotastic!

Who's THAT Irish Girl?

THE IDOL 5 HYPE BEGINS

Idol judge/resident British arsehole Simon Cowell has announced that he has found someone that is "good as Kelly Clarkson" during the initial auditions of the Idol 5...even though the show is still a couple months away from it's first airing.


And the winner is...

...an "Irish girl" that auditioned for the judges in Vegas...and sang a Chaka Khan song.


I'm sure she's very nice.


Click here for the full story.

Monday, November 07, 2005

The Punking of Constantine Maroulis

According to just jared, the smirking menace known as Constantine Maroulis was supposedly punk'd by his friend, Ryan Cabrera.

Click here for the full story.


And for those on the east coast that are into torturing themselves, they can go see Constantine LIVE in concert at the following locations:
  • December 21, 2005 - 7:30 PM @ Starland Ballroom in Sayreville, NY
  • December 22, 2005 - 7:30PM @ House of Blues in Atlantic City, NJ
I don't know about y'all, but I'm all set.

Friday, November 04, 2005

Here's DeNoNo!

Apparently, I'm an idiot. That whole "Where are the Idol runner-ups now?" bit in the Mercury News was a SIDEBAR for the full story about the DeNoNo and her starring role in "West Side Story."



Click here to revel in the DeNoNo of it all.

Thursday, November 03, 2005

What about DeNoNo? WHAT ABOUT DENONO???

The Mercury News recently posted the following mini-article, updating the public on the going ons of the Idol's second place winners...

WHERE ARE THEY NOW?
Posted November 1, 2005


American Idol runners-up: They're laughing all the way to the bank, that's what. Here's a look at their lives after ``Idol.''


Bo Bice: Bice, 29, who just lost out to Carrie Underwood, became a daddy in September. He also recently underwent intestinal surgery, but he didn't let that get him down. The long-locked Alabama rocker just hit the concert scene to raise money for hurricane relief. Also, check out the roster he has lined up to collaborate on his debut album: ex-Evanescence guitarist Ben Moody, Nickelback singer Chad Kroeger and Bon Jovi guitarist Richie Sambora.


Clay Aiken: OK, so Ruben took the prize, but Clay is still making his way to the top. Aiken just launched his second holiday tour, ``Joyful Noise.'' He's also stumping for UNICEF and working as a reporter for the TV series ``The Insider.''


Justin Guarini: Yo, want to know what happened to Justin after Kelly Clarkson cleaned his clock back in 2002? Well, first off, he moved to Hollywood (natch!) and released his self-titled debut album and his first flick, ``From Justin to Kelly,'' in 2003. Now 26, he's reportedly got a new CD in the works, is in talks for some kind of miniseries and -- check this out! -- he has shorn those signature locks for a new super-short do.

Suspiciously, there is no mention of the Idol 3 also-ran, Miss Diana DeGarmo (known as Diana DeNoNo in the Ru household). What kind of pansy, lazy ass Idol journalism is that?

I don't care for it! I don't care for it at all!


At least I have these pictures of the Guarini to keep me warm tonight...



Wednesday, November 02, 2005

Of course he was...

Ryan Seacrest was named "Queen of the Carnival" at the West Hollywood Halloween Festival on Monday evening. For the full story, click here.

Unfortunately, I missed seeing the Seacrest up close and personal.

Hi...I'm still VERY upset.

Tuesday, November 01, 2005

From Joseph to Amy

Idol 3 castoff Amy Adams is going the route of Vanessa Olivarez, Frenchie Davis, and Diana DeNoNo and starring in the touring company of a big-time musical production.

This time, the pink haired one is starring as the narrator in the latest rendition of "Joseph and his Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat."

For the full story on Amy, her new baby, her new role, and her hot hot baby daddy, click here.